


Hold me in my dreams

by intheenditsme (touchofbeige), touchofbeige



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Amnesia fic, BaekYeol - Freeform, ChanBaek - Freeform, M/M, Mpreg, Romance, XiuHan - Freeform, semiangst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-02
Updated: 2018-03-02
Packaged: 2018-05-30 18:08:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,204
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6434884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/touchofbeige/pseuds/intheenditsme, https://archiveofourown.org/users/touchofbeige/pseuds/touchofbeige
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Baekhyun is lost, sad, and incomplete for two years now. The only thing that keeps him going is the strange man in his dreams every night. After getting fed up with family, business and all these goddamn expectations, he finally hires a private investigator to look for his saviour. </p><p>Chanyeol tries to move on and get back to living his life to the fullest despite half of his heart missing. Even if Baekhyun isn’t with them anymore, knowing that he has Chanhyun is enough reason to still be happy.</p><p>When will fate finally be in their favor?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. It's been a long dream

**Author's Note:**

> re-edited. cross-posted to aff

Chapter 1: It’s been a long dream

~O~ 

In his dreams Baekhyun is being cocooned by arms of someone he can’t see, he should feel scared or alarmed but strangely he feels complete, content and happier than he’d been these past two years. Peace, that’s what he feels. The feeling that he hasn’t been able to feel since he woke up in that empty hospital room two years ago. His heart felt empty then, as empty as the walls surrounding his hospital room with it’s bleak and dreary colors meant to heal patients, but is doing the opposite to him. 

Baekhyun knows he’s sad, but he doesn’t know why. Somehow these strange dreams have him keep on going. They give him strength to face the day, his employees, his business partners, his parents and his doctor. Enough for him to give a fake smile and pretense of happiness to appease everyone that cares for him. 

So Baekhyun snuggles deeper and closer trying to inhale a scent he expects from deep in his mind to be there but he can’t reach it. 

Baekhyun looks up hoping this time that he’ll see the face of the man holding him and giving him solace every time he closes his eyes. It’s always been covered by this white smoke that makes him feel frustrated every damn time. 

How can he look for him if he doesn’t even know his name or even what he looks like? It’s been two years and he still can’t see his face, sometimes if he concentrates enough he’ll get a glimpse of a set of jaw and then full pink lips and just when he’s starting to get hopeful he’ll see his entire face his head starts to hurt so bad. Pain so bad he wakes up more frustrated that he was the other day. 

Baekhyun has been practicing in controlling his headache and now he can see these two features somewhat clearly without feeling any pain. So he tries to concentrate more, this time the lips of the man holding him starts to smile, and he feels a weird fluttering in his heart from the sight. 

He can do it! This time he can see him fully! He can see what he looks like today! This time he won’t stop. Baekhyun cheers himself inside. Nearly there….

Jaw….

Lips….

The start of his nose….

Just a little bit more…..

 

~riiii...nggg….~

 

A sudden ringing from a distance disturbed his concentration and he’s slowly drifting away from him. Baekhyun tries to hold on to his dreams. Tries to hold him closer. 

But like any other instance that this has happened it doesn’t work. 

 

He wakes up with a groan and reaches up to his alarm clock, the one that disturbed his sleep for the nth time now. Sometimes he wants to destroy it so that it won’t disturb his sleep any longer but he can’t. He wants to live in his dreams forever, if he can. In there, he can have peace and solace but that’s not possible. He has a job to do as the CEO of his family’s company and he has people depending on him so being selfish wouldn’t result to anything good. 

So Baekhyun resigns himself to his fate, stands up and prepares to take a shower. The remnants of his dream slowly slipping away into reality.

~oOo~ 

In another household a thousand miles away from Seoul, another alarm is also ringing and this time it isn’t unwelcome. A hand shoots up from under the blanket and reaches for the clock to turn it off, next to come out of this cocoon is a head with messy bed hair and almond shaped eyes still half asleep. Chanyeol stretches and yawns in his bed for the next five minutes and out of instinct he tries to reach beside him only to come up with nothing. It’s been four years and he still does this every morning, breaking his heart every single day. They did say old habits die hard, Chanyeol just learned it the hard and most painful way. 

This realization truly wakes him up, sobers him from his post-slumber haze. It’s been four years since he’s been able to hold Baekhyun, his love. He stares longingly at the space beside him and thinks about the what ifs and the could bes. What if Baekhyun’s still there beside him right now? They could’ve been a happy family, him, Baekhyun and their little ball of sunshine, Chanhyun. 

Another shrill ring of his alarm takes him back to reality, another day to face, another day to try to be complete. The door of his room opens and he meets those adorable puppy eyes that he loves so much glaring at him. 

“Daddy! You’re already awake?”, cue the cutest pout in existence. Chanyeol sits up and reaches for his little sulking little boy and pecks his face all over to apologize. He kisses his forehead, his cute button nose, his cheeks and his pouting lips. Little peals of childish laughter fills his room making his day brighter. 

Erasing all thoughts of what ifs in his mind and facing the reality he has for four years now. If there’s something he’s excited about, it’s getting to spend another morning, and another day with his little love. 

Remembering those times when Baekhyun can’t keep away from Chanhyun. Two months after he’s been born and he still can’t get enough of his baby, not even letting others hold him for too long. Imagine how protective Baekhyun would be now that his baby is grown up and is going to school already. He bet his other half would’ve cried buckets on Chanhyun’s first day. Always jumping awake every time the alarm rings just so he can go cuddle with their baby every morning. Chanyeol sighs at all these wonderful thoughts. He knows Baekhyun, wherever he may be now, would always want the best for Chanhyun. The child that they’ve been wanting for so long, their own child and their own little piece of perfection. 

Chanyeol goes to the kitchen carrying his baby who’s now squirming in excitement, he did promise his favorite pancakes as breakfast last night. He lets him down in his baby seat and starts preparing for pancake, Chanyeol knows Chanhyun means he has to behave or else his daddy will be unhappy. 

This was the breakfast his Baekhyun loved and now his mini Baekhyun is also addicted to it, his special pancake with loads of maple syrup. Chanhyun always reminding him of all the simple ways why he loved and still loves his puppy-like father. Chanhyun is Chanyeol’s world right now and he won’t ever wish of anything else. 

He starts mixing the pancake batter and looks forward to new experiences and memories he can make with Chanhyun.

~oOo~ 

Baekhyun is supposed to just take a shower, he has a lot of meetings scheduled today after all, but he decides to take a bath complete with all his scented candles that always makes him calm. He needed this after that frustration this morning, the scent of his jasmine and strawberry bath soap slowly lulling him back to sleep. 

He caresses the scar on his stomach that has been there ever since he woke up at that pristine white hospital room, alone and empty. He feels this unexplainable sense of comfort and happiness every time he does this. However hard Baekhyun tries to remember he can’t, even if he wants to so badly. What happened to him? How did he get to the hospital? How did he get this scar? 

Questions, lots of questions that hasn’t been answered yet. 

Slowly, he drifts off to sleep. 

 

__

_A hand was caressing the bulge in his stomach and he’s looking down, smiling to the owner of these hands._

_“I’m so excited Baek. You don’t know how happy you’re making me.” a deep voice says sending tingling feelings down his spine._

_“He just kicked babe” Baekhyun hears his voice saying happily._

_“I know, I’m just-”_

__

Kicked? Who kicked? 

 

Why are you holding my stomach? What’s happening?

 

_  
He can hear his tinkling laugh while his hand slowly reaches up and wipes the tears away from the other person._

_“Seriously, you cry at the littlest reason” his voice says_

_“It’s not little, baby. This, this is proof that we made something together. Proof that despite every obstacle we encounter in our way, we will always make it through. Together.” Strangely made him want to cry too._

_“Together.” He hears his voice saying._

_“Together forever.” The deep voice that soothes him answers back._

_He starts coming up, face getting closer to his, reaching up to kiss him._

_Who are you let me see you…._

_Closer.._

_He can see a perfect set of teeth that’s visible because he’s smiling so wide._

_Closer…._

_A hand to his cheek_

_Close--_

_“Wake up Byun, answer your goddamn phone. I know I’m just your secretary but I’m your friend too, and I’m telling you, you need to answer this or else….”_ His secretary Jongdae has set his annoying voice with this annoying message as his caller ringtone, and he isn’t happy at all with the way he was disturbed. It keeps on ringing repeatedly in the background of the bathroom.

“UGH!” Baekhyun wakes up from his dream yet again. This time feeling sadder and more pissed off than when he woke up earlier. 

Ignoring his damned phone he gets lost in his thoughts again. His dream, was it telling him something? 

 

Was he really pregnant? Is that what this scar is for? His parents told him he got this from a bad accident that only left him in a coma for almost a year. Although it seemed suspicious since his wound doesn’t look like one he still bought it because who else should he trust more than his parents? Now he’s not too sure anymore….

 

That little glimpse of his past is enough to strengthen his resolve. This time he will look for the answers himself. 

 

All these missing memories, questions answered, feeling of emptiness, he wants it all gone. 

 

It’s time. Baekhyun decided. He rinses and gets ready for another busy and disinteresting day. Gets his phone from the countertop and answers the call. 

 

He now has a new purpose in life, if before he was a robot always following his parents whim, now he’s renewed and driven. 

 

He’s Byun Baekhyun, everyone involved in this should get ready, he doesn’t spare mercy.

~oOo~ 

“Chanhyun-ah, here is your favorite pancakes!” Chanyeol says slowly making his way to his baby and setting his plate down. 

The toddler sitting starts wiggling around his seat clearly excited for his breakfast. Chanyeol sits in front of him to cut his pancakes into little pieces despite the toddler’s objections. 

“Daddy, I can do this by myself”, he whines. Chuckling, Chanyeol ignores him and continues trying to feed his child, “Say aaahhhh!” fork with a bite of pancake going to Chanhyun’s little toddler mouth. The toddler despite his earlier protests still opened his mouth and munched on his favorite happily. Chanyeol chuckles while stroking his baby’s cheeks. 

Even if he misses Baekhyun every single second of every single day, he is happy. His little ball of sunshine makes sure of that. 

__

_“Baekhyun-ah, I will always love you, wherever you are, I know you are happy and is always watching over us. I’ll always take care of our baby, so don’t worry. Our little piece of perfection, Park Chanhyun.”_


	2. Dreams and reality

Chapter 2: Dreams and Reality 

_Two years ago_

_Baekhyun wakes up feeling pain all over his entire body. Groaning, he tries to move to his side but was hindered by wires attached to his body, one on his chest monitoring his heartbeat, another to his hand connected to an iv drip creating this drip drip drip sound that fills the silence of the room he’s in and a wire connecting his nose to an oxygen, helping him breathe through the tightness of his chest._

_Once he started moving, the beeping to his left, which he assumes is connected to his heart, becomes erratic as if his sudden waking up has his heart reminding his body he’s alive and the entire world too. The beeping gets louder that he starts getting annoyed by it, he wants it to stop but he can’t speak from the pain in his throat._

_He settles on looking around the unfamiliar space he’s currently in. From his observations it looks like he’s in a hospital room. It’s big, he noticed, probably the biggest this hospital has to offer knowing his parents. It has a sofa set at the right side of the room directly in front of the door, opposite the direction of his bed. A television set hangs in front of him. A door to his left, leading to what he guesses is the bathroom. Amidst the white walls that seems to go on and on are little bursts of colors here and there. It seems that his mother, or probably her secretary took their time in decorating the place with flowers. His favorite flowers decorated the room, putting life in this seemingly lifeless place. Lilacs, roses, tulips, orchids in purple, red, yellow and white._

_This brought out a little smile on Baekhyun’s face, thankful someone remembered how he loves flowers. A minute after, he notices that something seems wrong. However he fails to put a name on his feelings, he doesn’t know how to describe what he’s feeling right now. He feels empty, somehow, and he doesn’t know or understand why._

_It’s like he misses something or someone, he doesn’t know. He can’t be too sure._

~O~ 

_beep_

Current day Baekhyun is interrupted from his daydreaming by another alarm from his phone. He lifts it off from the table and looks at the reminder about his flight to Jeju island next week. He’s now the current CEO and soon to be chairman of Light Corporations, although still only a year in his management the company has enjoyed good results to the happiness of shareholders. He has yet to finish visiting all of their company branches all over South Korea and the Jeju branch being a relatively new acquired property he might have to spend some time there for the next few months. 

This is his life now. Making sure that the employees and their families who are dependent on their company doesn’t starve. Being a hotel and resorts chain company CEO, he has lots of them under his responsibility too. 

The Baekhyun of two years ago who just woke up in an empty hospital room to an even emptier feeling to his heart feels like someone from a different world. The Baekhyun now is sure, confident, tenacious, the feared heir to his father’s legacy, or at least he tries his hard to be. 

Deep inside he knows he wants a different life, a happier life than this monotonous and bleak one. A universe that seems to be in him, but he can’t reach out to no matter how much he tries to because just when it’s at the tip of his fingertips, it slips away. His brain may not remember but his heart definitely does. 

From his seat on his table he can see the view from his floor to ceiling windows. The view from the 40th floor is something, it’s beautiful and also a sign of success. A lot would die for this right now as it connotes power and richness among other things. Well, these are things Baekhyun can live without to be honest, but he’s here and he’s got to stop complaining. 

A knock on his door along with his secretary’s familiar head peeking through his door interrupted him, ‘Mr. Byun’, Jongdae says, ‘he’s here.’ Jongdae was his best friend when he was a kid, unfortunately his mother did not like him befriending someone as “low” as their maid’s son, so their friendship stopped. After his hospitalization though he asked for Jongdae, he wanted some sort of normalcy in this unfamiliar world, this time his mother didn’t oppose. Sadly, because of their estrangement Jongdae doesn’t know what happened to him during the years he can’t remember. 

Jongdae, sensing his dour mood, enters the room first and closes the door behind him. ‘Are you okay boss?’ he asks, concern laced in his voice. Baekhyun lifts up his head and looks into his secretary’s eyes and gives him a slight nod. ‘Yes, I am. Bring him in, Jongdae,” and offers him a small reassuring smile. 

A few minutes after, a blonde petite man with doll like features dressed in all black and donning a leather jacket entered his office. “I assume you’re the best detective there is,” was Baekhyun’s greeting to the new person, going straight to business. “Let’s sit down over there.” He gestures to the sofa set in his office while walking himself towards it.

“Thank you, I wouldn’t say I am, but I can do my job well.” The blonde answers with a tiny smile while sitting himself down. “My name is Luhan, Mr. CEO.” He says while offering a hand which Baekhyun promptly receives with a shake. 

They’re sitting face to face now and looking into the detective's eyes, Baekhyun says, “Well, Luhan I don’t need you to do your job well, I want it done perfectly. I want answe-”

“You got hospitalised four years ago for reasons unbeknownst to you.” Luhan interrupts. “You tried asking your doctors but they kept on saying the same thing, that you got into a car accident and nothing more. You were on a coma for almost two years before you woke up confused and no memory of anything that happened including six years worth of memory prior to that accident. You kept asking but nobody bothered to explain or tell you what happened during the years which you have no memory of. Correct?”

 

_  
Baekhyun was trying to sit up, clenching his teeth on the pain, when he heard a loud beeping noise that couldn’t have come from the machine next to him a few second after his parents and some doctors and nurses came rushing from outside. A quick peek at the outside of the room had him see that he was being guarded. Baekhyun was both confused at that and happy at seeing his parents after being awake for nearly an hour now. _

_‘Hel-’ Baekhyun begins to speak but was interrupted by his mother’s bone crushing hug and loud sobbing. He can’t help but wince because of the pain, realizing this, his mother starts to loosen up her hold on him. ‘Son, are you okay?’ His mother asks while crying. Baekhyun doesn’t know how to answer that, seeing his stoic and strict mother that always shows no emotion crying over him. A little part of him is happy deep inside, so he starts to hug her back._

_‘Doctor! You said my son is going to be okay?’ His mother asks _-demands-_ from the doctor behind her while still clutching onto him tightly. Looking behind his mother, Baekhyun sees his father standing with some doctors and nurses. His father looks bored, as he always does, but this time there’s a hint of care in his eyes he’s never seen before. Care? From the almighty Chairman Byun? Now that’s something he hasn’t seen. _

_“Mrs. Byun-” the doctor starts and Baekhyun’s attention transfers to him. Seeing the shaking hands of the doctor, showing how nervous he is being with his parents -who wouldn’t to be honest?- he decides to interfere._

_“I’m okay mom, why am I here?” Baekhyun noticed his hoarse voice and painful throat, it’s as if he hasn’t spoken for a long time and clears his throat. “I’m sorry for breaking my arm” showing his arm, that to his surprise isn’t broken. “What’s this? Why isn’t it broken?”_

_“Sweetie, don’t you remember anything?” His mother asks and he shakes his head no. All he remembers is that he broke his arm trying to rescue his pet from falling off the tree outside his room’s balcony; so it doesn’t explain why he has all these apparatuses connected to him but strangely enough his arm isn’t in a cast. Having completely let go of him, his mother looks at the doctor seemingly asking for an explanation._

_“Mr. Byun Baekhyun.” Baekhyun looks up to the doctor. “I believe you are suffering from a post-traumatic amnesia and I think it’s safe to assume your last memory is breaking your arm?” Baekhyun nods which the doctor acknowledges._

_“When was this? What do you think the year is right now?”, the doctor asks Baekhyun, staring at him intently._

_“20..10? Why?” Baekhyun is… confused, and the horrified looks his parents exchanged after he answered isn’t helping him at all._

_“It’s 2016 now Mr. Byun.” the doctor gives him a look of sympathy. “You’ve been in a coma for the past two years, and it seems you’ve lost your memory of what happened before.”_

_These words may have been simple, but the effect it had on Baekhyun wasn’t. How will you believe something as unbelievable as this?_

_“No…., it can’t be… I just started my junior year in the university….” Baekhyun chuckles humorlessly. Looking around the room, “You can’t be serious right? It’s 2010!!!”_

_“Stop pranking me!”, he shouts startling all the occupants of the room, and sending her mother into another crying fit._

_“I’m so sorry, Mr. Byun. I will have you taken to some post body checks to ensure all is well with your body and then I will have you scheduled to a psychiatrist to help you recover your memory.” the doctor says and the nurses with him all nod, after which he excuses himself out, leaving the room in nothing but silence._

_Horror. Utmost horror. That’s how Baekhyun felt after being told of this news. Six years? A lot could’ve happened in those six years, memories that he doesn’t remember anymore. The emptiness he felt when he opened his eyes a while ago explained by these words, mere words that didn’t help him._

_He begins shaking and unknowingly, tears fall from his eyes. “Oh son, it’s okay, your mother is here. You’ll be okay.”_

_“Why? How?” He asks but he is ignored by everyone in the room._

_“It’s better if you don’t remember anything son. It’s better this way, you can start over again.” His mother gives him a smile but strangely it didn’t feel right. It’s like his body is telling him this isn’t the right set of arms that gives comfort to him. Everything just feels so wrong. Especially the way he feels, and deep inside he suspects that his mother is happy with his situation._

__

~oOo~ 

“Mr. Byun…?”

Baekhyun blinks and clears his throat. “Mostly. My parents refuse to answer any of my questions and even the hospital refuses claiming that they lost all my records that time because of a burglary.” 

Tearing up, Baekhyun says, “I just want to know answers so I can finally live in peace without this weight on my chest weighing me down and stopping me from moving on.” 

“Move on? How can I when I don’t know what I’m moving on from?” Baekhyun hastily wipes the stray tears that dropped from his eyes. 

“Sorry about that.” Getting his composure back he stares at Luhan in the eye and says, “So help me.” 

“It’s okay, Mr. Byun.” Luhan starts, “I understand and I will do my best,” stops and says more determinedly, “no I will give you your answers. This I promise.” Looking at this broken man sitting in front of him Luhan feels the need to help him, in any way that he can. 

This man that has everything in his fingertips and can even make people bend on their knees with a snap of his fingers is, dare he say it, empty. Sadness is seeping through him, Luhan knows that this man, is someone alone in this world. 

A tiny smile blooms on Baekhyun’s face at these words. A little bit of hope suddenly starting to grow inside his heart. “Thank you.” He says, voice nearly a whisper. 

Somehow, he is comfortable with the company of this blonde man, and whatever this feeling is, it’s enough to make him trust this person with his past and his future. He already tried looking before, god knows he tried, but nothing. 

Luhan smiles in return. Seeing those sad eyes hurt him and he swears he will help in alleviating this pain, so much pain for such a handsome young man. When he entered the doors of this office he expected to be given instructions for petty reasons, like the usual; to investigate a cheating partner or to look for dirty information on business partners they don’t like, but not this. 

Not a lost soul looking for his way, the way back to a home. 

“Also, keep this confidential, no one must know I’m looking for answers, especially my parents.”

~O~ 

“Chanhyun! You’re going to be late! Hurry up!”

Chanyeol calls out to his son while he’s in the kitchen trying to clean up their dishes. Chanhyun is a pre-school student now in a school near theirs and sometimes this reality makes Chanyeol want to cry. _His baby has grown up so much!_ He thinks while wiping imaginary tears from his eyes. 

After washing the dishes, and still no Chanhyun, Chanyeol looks outside his window. The early morning calmness his house by the beach offers him, the tranquility and peace he gets to enjoy every morning, and thinks, ‘ahh this is home.’

For four years now, this is what he and Chanhyun had considered home ever since that accident that took Baekhyun’s life. Chanhyun was only four months old when that happened so he doesn’t have memories of his papa but he does, oh how much Chanyeol does. Moving away from the city is his way of forgetting, or trying to if he’s being honest to himself. Try as he might, he will never really erase Baekhyun from his heart and his mind. He’s been imprinted to his very core, his soulmate. 

He and Chanhyun live in a modest house near the beach where he and Chanhyun can enjoy the way the sun rises and sets everyday. It has three rooms, one for each of them and the spare for his very rare guests. It’s also near Chanhyun’s school and just a bus ride to his work, so it’s convenient for them both. Located in a friendly community that Chanyeol doesn’t need to worry much for Chanhyun’s safety because he knows his friendly neighbors are always willing to lend a hand whenever he’s busy. Don’t get him wrong his son is always top priority for him. 

“Daddy, I’m here! Let’s go!!” Chanhyun runs from his room, backpack slung over his shoulders and stops by the door to put his shoes on. He knows he’s very late. Breakfast was so yummy because his daddy made him his favorite for twice in a week now. 

Looking at his child hastily putting on his school shoes, Chanyeol can’t help but smile at his life now. Another day, another adventure with Chanhyun, another day of missing him. Chanyeol’s life sure isn’t easy but he wouldn’t ask for anything else.

~O~

He works in a coffee shop owned by him and his hyung since he studied culinary in college and wanted a shop of his own where he can control his time since he was also a single parent raising a child. Their shop is simple and homely which is why they have gathered a lot of regulars over the years. They try their best to make their customers to be able to do their work properly if ever they came for that, or a place where friends can catch up over some coffee. Not to mention how delicious their pasties are, according to reviews by their over satisfied customers. 

 

Like any other day at this time of morning rush hours, they’re already busy with a lot of workers wanting to get their early morning coffees before going to work. A drink to boost their energy and wake themselves up fully. 

Chanyeol is in charge of the cakes and pastries while his partner, Minseok hyung, is the barista. Minseok or Xiumin, as he sometimes wants to be called, may not be related to him by blood but he is his hyung through and through and Chanyeol will always be thankful to him. 

He has been with his hyung since they were both doing part time jobs in the same coffee shop a couple of blocks away from his university, and now they have their own. Their hard work has made their shop be part of the lists of the top shops in Jeju and they’re always getting excellent reviews therefore they’re always visited by tourists and residents alike. Little achievements that couldn’t help but make him proud. 

“Hyung”, Sehun interrupts his thoughts after coming back from delivering the order of one customer. The kid is one of their staff in the shop, although he’s bratty, Chanyeol knows he’s thankful for the help the kid gives them. “Hmm”, is Chanyeol’s response while looking at said boy. He’s been getting taller lately, what has this brat been doing, he muses. It is also inevitable for Chanyeol and Minseok to treat Sehun as their little brother, a spoiled one at that too. 

“Have you heard about the famous resort a few miles from here?” Sehun asks looking at him interestingly, with his eyes sparkling. Chanyeol contains his shudder, _what happened to his poker faced dongsaeng?_ Chanyeol just raised his eyebrow at him in return, wondering why the younger is staring at him that way. “Of course I did, why are you suddenly asking?”, he asks warily. 

“What if we go there this weekend, eh hyung?” Sehun asks him enthusiastically. 

“Uhh.”

‘That’s actually a good idea!’ Minseok answers before Chanyeol can answer himself. Since they’ve moved here almost two years ago, they haven’t been on that famous resort yet. They were too busy trying to set up their new lives here and also their business, they just hadn’t had the time. 

“Right hyung?!” The youngest of them three excitedly exclaims, eyes shining in excitement. “But that’s not only what I was about to talk about!” Chanyeol looks questioningly at the smirking younger. The latter looks at Minseok with questioning eyes before looking back at Sehun, “Then what is it?”

“I bet you’d be very happy hyung!” Sehun exclaims, enjoying the attention his hyung is giving him. “You see its-” 

A loud ringing interrupts their conversation and both Chanyeol and Sehun looked at the owner of the phone. Minseok sheepishly grins at them while getting his phone and answering the call. “Hello?” Chanyeol and Sehun are just staring at him and guessing by the smile that bloomed in their hyung’s face it could only be one person, “Luhan! How’s Seoul?” 

“Excuse me,” a customer says and brings their focus back. While Chanyeol and Sehun are taking care of the customer, Minseok slowly walked to the back of shop to talk with his boyfriend. 

After a few minutes Minseok comes back out to the front again and was bombarded by questions. Luhan only left yesterday and these two idiots are obviously already missing him. “Hyung, was that Luhan hyung?” asks Sehun. 

“Obviously, you brat,” Chanyeol says while lightly hitting the said brat’s head. Although unsuccessful given the counter separating the two of them. 

“Hey!” Sehun was about to get back at his laughing hyung when Minseok interrupts them. “Yes that was him, apparently he got a big assignment so he’ll have to be flying back and forth for the next few weeks.” Seeing the sad face on their youngest, he quickly added. “But he’ll be back tomorrow to get a few of his things first.” 

“What’s the case this time hyung?” Chanyeol curiously asks. “Apparently some CEO lost his memory due to an accident and for some reasons, explanations are being kept from him. So he hired Luhan to get some answers for his questions.”

Nodding, “That’s a pretty interesting case hyung. Hope this person finds the answers he’s looking for.” Chanyeol says with a smile, going back to ring the customer who just entered their shop.

~O~

Baekhyun, stands in the middle of his bathroom, in front of the mirror looking at his reflection. Hand caressing the scar in his stomach while an uncontrollable tear drops from his eye. He often finds himself doing this, as if out of habit, and can’t help but feel a myriad of emotions. It gives him hope and happiness he can’t explain. Hopefully he’ll get the answers soon enough. Trusting Luhan that he’ll stay true to his words. 


	3. my reverie, my reality

“So, Luhan, what’s happening? You don’t usually spend a lot of time in Seoul for your recent cases,” Minseok asks the blonde man while he prepares dinner for the both of them. “Is this a serious case then? You only do this for those kinds of work.” 

“Mhm.” Luhan only hums as a response to his partner, currently being too distracted by his phone - he’s been answering some messages and sending emails, already asking some of his most trusted sources about things related to the case to get a headstart on it. Some basic and somewhat private information about his client would be a good start. 

After sending the last email, he locks his phone and looks in the other’s direction in the kitchen from his position in the living room. It’s not that big of an apartment so it's fairly easy for him to do so. “It’s a big client, babe, and that’s all you’re getting from me.” Luhan cheekily answers and lets out a laugh when the other scoffs at this response. 

Luhan knows his boyfriend is curious but he is nothing but a trustworthy detective that keeps his mouth shut about his clients. Well, most of the time anyway, since sometimes he slips one or two things to his boyfriend when he wants some advice. 

A comfortable silence settles between them, as Luhan turns on the television and watches the news at low volume, while Minseok continues to prepare their dinner, and when everything’s already laid out on the table Minseok calls Luhan over. After settling down in his seat, Minseok gives Luhan _the stare_ that tells him that the other wasn’t satisfied with his earlier answer. Luhan was just waiting for the - “Really?” Minseok says with a tone of disbelief. “You always say that about your clients, Luhan, but this is new.” the other comments. 

“What? I can’t be a nice employee for once and actually keep my mouth shut?” Luhan answers the other while keeping his eyes on the food laid out before him. Luhan swears his boyfriend is the best cook there is. Minseok just laughs at how Luhan seems to be salivating over food, a few days in the capital and he returns home acting like a starved puppy. 

“How will you even survive for a few weeks there, Lu, when you can’t even eat properly,” Minseok starts staring pointedly at his boyfriend to get his point across. “So unless you justify to me why I should let you stay there more than you usually do at a time, you have to give me something.” 

Luhan is touched, he truly is, and under normal circumstances he would actually tell his boyfriend about what he’s currently working on, but this isn’t one of those cases. “Just trust me on this, Min. I promise to keep myself safe at all times. You know me.” Catching his boyfriend’s eyes, Luhan offers a reassuring smile and reaches for his hand. 

“You’re really not telling me who’s this new client of yours, are you?” Minseok says while intertwining his fingers with the other’s. 

“No, I can’t, babe. I’m sorry.” Minseok sighs, he knows he can’t do anything about it once his boyfriend’s mind is already set. “Okay then, now eat before you start on your new case.” 

Luhan all too happily agrees.

~O~ 

"Chanhyun, stop running away from me already!" exclaims an exasperated and huffing Chanyeol. For the past hour he's been trying to catch his kid that keeps on getting away from him while laughing at his misery. Kids and their never ending supply of energy, seriously. "You need to take a bath now." 

A 'No!' accompanied by non stop laughter is what he gets in return. Chanyeol gets up and starts running after his baby. They just got back from the coffee shop, he takes Chanhyun there after picking him up from school, having made him a special playpen inside their office to keep a better eye on him. Chanyeol’s tired, but nothing beats this feeling of happiness he gets every time he gets to spend time with his child. Little moments like this is what completes him. Even if it adds a lot more to his tiredness. 

“Didn’t you used to like baths? With your toy duckies and all the bubbles?” he tries once again to talk it out with his child, as maybe the promise of being able to play with his toys will convince him. Chanyeol believes in talking it out to solve problems even with his four year old kid. 

“No!!!!” Chanhyun shouts, accompanied with a lot of cute giggly sounds is what he gets in return. So okay, maybe diplomacy doesn’t work on kids, but it was worth a shot anyway. Chanyeol can’t help but laugh at himself as he tries to catch a running child, filling their apartment with hearty laughter. 

Deep in his mind Chanyeol thinks Chanhyun’s laughter sounds so much like his. _Even his laughter is taken after you, Baekhyun, seriously - did our kid ever get anything from my genes?! Your puppy looks, your laughter, your wonderful personality, everything, Chanhyun has it all, Baek._ He would be jealous but he’s mostly just happy for this makes him feel like Baekhyun is still with them, with him. 

If there’s a word to describe how Chanyeol feels, it’s contented. He is and although he could’ve had better circumstances, Chanyeol knows this is enough for him. Having his son by his side, a reminder of their love that they both fought for. Speaking of his son, he still needs to give him a bath so, “Hyun-ah! Come here!” 

“Hyun-ah!”

 

 

__

_Six years ago …_

“Hyun. Baek hyun-ssi!” A running Chanyeol shouts after the person who left his wallet at the coffee shop where he’s working. The owner, Byun Baekhyun according to the ID inside the said wallet, is running away from him and Chanyeol doesn’t understand why. Ever since they passed the alley after the shop, he started to run, even when Chanyeol was already calling his name out loud. 

 

Baekhyun just exited the coffee shop he always frequents when he has school work to finish when he felt that he was being followed. He just had to finish a paper even though his classes were already over for the day. He had to write a 1,500 word film reaction on the documentary they just watched earlier in class and aside from that one, he also had to write two more reports of the same length all for the same professor. 

So instead of going back to his apartment immediately he decided to finish it all with the help of coffee and his favorite strawberry cheesecake served at this shop. His brain is tired and any thinking is beyond him at this point so you can’t really blame him for running away at the first thought of danger and not hearing anything the other kept on shouting at him. 

It’s now 9 o’clock and the shop is already closing so Baekhyun hurriedly types in his closing sentences for the last of the three assignments he had to do. Baekhyun is tired and drained, physically and emotionally, he just had to churn out 4,500 words that he isn’t quite sure make sense, let alone have the right state of mind to check his belongings thoroughly before leaving his table. 

It also didn’t help that his favorite table was the one in the corner which makes sure he can’t be seen by most of the patrons of the shop. He just stuffed his laptop, notes and readings inside his trusty backpack and headed outside. He still has to walk a few blocks before he can catch a bus. Even if he came from a wealthy background, he chose to do this - to have a normal university life. That’s what he asked from his parents before he has to take over the company and say goodbye to any normality. 

Baekhyun was just walking silently when he noticed someone following him. Because of the lateness of the hour this area is already empty except for him, and, looking back, someone all clad in black. Baekhyun attempted to walk a little bit faster just to check because it’s not really nice to accuse someone immediately but when the person adjusted his pace, he lowkey started panicking. Baekhyun began to run after that, ignoring everything in his surroundings. It’s his first year living by himself so he still hasn’t adapted to walking alone. 

So he runs fast. 

 

 

Chanyeol is working as a part time baker in the coffee shop to be able to finance his culinary classes since those are pretty expensive. He gets in at five in the afternoon during Mondays, Wednesdays and Thursdays and earlier during the other days of the week. Chanyeol practically just stays in the kitchen, baking cakes and pastries till it's the shop’s closing time. 

Even when he actually applied to be a waiter, thinking his inexperience won’t give him a chance to work in the kitchen, it all changed when his manager discovered that he’s a culinary arts student. Apparently it was his Minseok hyung, the barista, that “accidentally” slipped this fact when talking to the manager one time. Now he gets to bake some cakes that will be served for the next day, he prepares them and then puts them in a freezer, ready for consumption when the shop opens. 

Since Chanyeol spends most of his time inside the kitchen, he doesn’t really notice or remember the faces of some of their regular customers so when his Minseok hyung, who makes the best coffee in the world, in Chanyeol’s opinion, asked him to give the forgotten wallet to the guy who just went out of the shop, he didn’t know what to expect. 

Certainly not someone who keeps on running away from him, surely. Huffing, Chanyeol looks up to see that their distance is growing smaller now, gotta thank his long legs, until he was finally close enough to hold and yank the other’s arm. “Baekhyun. Byun Baekhyun.” 

“You are him, right?” Chanyeol asks, panting.

What he also didn’t expect was for a heavy backpack to be swung at him, which he thankfully was able to deflect although it was too close.

The third thing he didn’t expect to see this supposedly-just-another-weeknight for him was to see the most beautiful creature he had ever had the pleasure of laying his eyes on. Chanyeol swears this isn’t human standing before him but an angel. 

An angel that just tried to hurt him and is swinging his bag at him again. 

“Wait. Stop it!”, Chanyeol says, finally snapping out of his daze, letting go of the other’s hand and using both hands to stop the bag from hitting him again. His head was grazed earlier, luckily he was able to deflect before it actually landed heavily on his face cause by looking at it, he’s pretty sure a laptop is inside the said bag. 

“What do you want?”, the smaller, yes, _he’s towering over the guy and he thinks it's the cutest, along with his furious eyes that make him look more like a disgruntled puppy than being scary,_ says to him. “Hey!”

“Huh?”, Chanyeol blinks and suddenly remembers there’s a person in front of him, _way to go, Chanyeol, you’re certainly not creeping him out now._ “Oh, this. I was about to give you this. You forgot this at the shop.”, he says, offering him a smile and showing the black leather wallet he’s been holding onto for a while now. 

Baekhyun’s eyes widen and he stops his hand from his attempt to hit the tall person once again. 

A spark of recognition flashes through the smaller’s eyes and he starts to blush out of embarrassment. Chanyeol’s heart keeps beating too fast at the sight. Chanyeol gulps, he thinks he’s about to get into trouble, especially when Baekhyun started to speak again, this time with a soft voice very different from his tone earlier. 

“Oh, I…” Baekhyun starts, “I’m sorry for hitting you with my bag.” Due to humiliation he wanted to get his wallet fast and get on his way already, so he reaches out but then his hands only caught air. 

“At least look at me while you’re taking it.” Chanyeol says, offering the other his best winning smile. _Great, he’s fucked isn’t he._

“No, I… I’ll just take the wallet and leave. I’m really sorry for hitting you with my bag.” Baekhyun is playing with his feet now, rubbing the soles against the concrete, anything just to avoid looking up. _Why does this person have to be so tall, so much taller than me?_

“Why were you even hitting me?” Chanyeol decides to tease the other, mocking anger in his tone. “I even had to run after you.” Although he is basically melting inside from how cute the owner turned out to be, he has to appear tough a little bit, okay? To save his manly, giant pride, or something. 

“Because I thought you were gonna hurt me!” Baekhyun semi-shouts, finally looking Chanyeol in the eyes and getting distracted once he had a decent glimpse of the other. _He had to be handsome too, just ugh._ “I mean…. Loo- look at you.” Baekhyun stutters while eyeing the other up and down. Which was a bad idea because he ended up realizing just _how_ good looking the other is and it was sending his heart into overdrive. 

Chanyeol looks down at himself too and sees that he’s wearing an all black ensemble - black hoodie, black sweatpants - and chuckles at this. “Oh, I’m sorry, usually I wear more colors, but it’s winter and these are more comfortable.” 

“Umm, no, it’s okay, it’s still my fault.” Baekhyun looks up. 

 

Chanyeol looks down at this, their eyes meet and they both blush and look away. 

 

“Oh yeah, here.” Chanyeol starts awkwardly, extending his hand that’s holding the wallet to the smaller. “Your wallet.”

 

“Ah, yes. Thank you.” Baekhyun timidly reaches for it in return. His cheeks are so warm, he’s pretty sure they are tinted red right now, thankfully it’s dark here so the other wouldn’t see it clearly. 

 

Their hands accidentally touch. 

 

Their eyes meet. 

 

They look away. 

 

Both with blushing faces. 

 

“So...ummm” Chanyeol starts. Hearing this, Baekhyun looks up and stares. “Do you want me to walk you to the bus stop? So you won’t get scared anymore?”

“S-sure.” Baekhyun accepts, blushful. 

 

Both of them keep on stealing glances at each other on the way to the bus stop, feeling a strange, yet not an unwelcome feeling in their chests. 

_Happiness. Baekhyun asks, is this what happiness feels like?_

_Present day_

 

Baekhyun is suddenly woken up by the constant ringing of his phone. Reaching for it on his nightstand, he swipes to answer the call without bothering to see who it was, returning to his previous position under the blankets right after. 

 

“Hello?” he croaked. 

 

 _“Hey, is our lunch date still on? My flight will be arriving at 11 am. Think you can still make it?”_ the person on the other line said, totally waking Baekhyun up once the implication of these words sank in. 

 

“Uhh, sure. Text me where you want to eat then.”, Baekhyun says with no enthusiasm in his voice. 

 

The person on the other line chuckled at this and Baekhyun felt guilty. _“You could’ve at least acted a little bit excited for this.”_ The person on the line teases and laughs. _“Anyway, I’ll just send it to you, see you later.”_

 

“Mhm.”, before he can come up with any excuse the person already hang up. 

 

Baekhyun lies on his bed and stares at the ceiling, contemplating how to survive yet another day in this empty life of his. That was a nice dream though, he thinks, and as usual, it's with him again. The mysterious guy that always plagued his dreams but never his reality. 

Him with that deep voice and comfortable warmth that Baekhyun so craves for everytime he opens his eyes even without knowing how he looks like. Even just hearing it in his dreams has given him more emotions than when he’s talking to the guy he’s supposed to be marrying, if his mother gets what she wants, which she usually does. 

He isn’t really planning to marry him, but if nothing happens from this search, he might be really forced to by his parents. He can convince this person to disagree with this proposal, they aren’t bound by love anyway, but a business deal but what will be his reason? A reason good enough to drive him into disobeying his parents for once in his life. 

 

Baekhyun checks his phone again, hoping that he got a message from Luhan, but when there isn’t any, he stands up and starts to get ready. 

 

This is going to be a long day.

~O~ 

“By the way, hyung, are we really going to that resort?” Sehun asks Chanyeol while their shop doesn’t have many customers ordering anymore since the rush is finished, the rush hour has just finished. 

 

“What was the name of the resort again?” Chanyeol answers his dongsaeng distractedly, as he’s trying to reply to his son’s teacher about an upcoming parents-teacher conference. 

 

Sheepishly Sehun answers him, “I actually don’t remember, hyung. But you know, the one that’s famous.” 

 

“Well, I’ve heard a lot about it but sure, let’s see if we can make time for next week, okay?”, Chanyeol says, finally pocketing his phone and looking at the other. “It’s about time we get a little break, right?” 

“Yeah, you’re right.” Minseok says joining their conversation. “Too bad Luhan won’t be able to join us though.” 

“How long is Luhan hyung staying in Seoul, hyung?” Chanyeol asks him. 

“Two weeks or so, and then he’s gonna come back here for a little.” Minseok answers looking at the other sadly. “I’m just not used to not having him around for a week, more so if it’s longer than that.”

“Seriously, hyung? You can’t survive without Luhan hyung for that short?” Sehun joins in teasing the other. 

“Shut up brat.” the older says feigning anger but ended up laughing at their youngest’s teasing. 

“You should be proud though, hyung.” Chanyeol starts to say, “Luhan hyung gets to help people look for answers they can’t seem to find on their own.”  
“I know, Chanyeol, I know.”


	4. Oh fate, why so cruel yet sweet at the same time

Chapter 4: Oh fate, why so cruel yet sweet at the same time 

Chanyeol, Sehun, and Minseok can’t help themselves from chuckling just by watching Chanhyun so excited after seeing the grand entrance of the resort they were about to enter. The toddler can’t stop squealing and is running everywhere much to the amusement of his father. 

Although he’s already started kindergarten, Chanhyun still couldn’t go to a lot of places aside from his home and school which is just a few blocks away. Chanyeol feels guilty because a kid needs to be able to explore and go to places, but he’s been so busy these past few years, being a single father after all is hard work. 

So this little vacation has been a welcome break not just to them three who are busy running the cafe, but also to their little one. A new playground for Chanhyun even just for this weekend. 

They’d been staying in Jeju for almost two years now and yet they haven’t been able to explore the beauty of the island or even visit some of the resorts that are famous in the area. They were so busy with opening the shop, starting a new life away from the capital and for Chanyeol, raising up a baby. 

His baby that is now a grown up - who even likes to call himself ‘little man’ - sometimes Chanyeol feels emotional over this but he’s happy his baby is growing well. 

Chanhyun stops from his running and looks back at his father and uncles, seeing that they’re a little bit away from him he starts to laugh and call them over. 

“Dad, uncles! hurry up!! We have to play in the beach!” the little man huffs, staring at the others accusingly, they must be doing this to lessen his play time, he thinks to himself. 

The three men all laughs at this accusatory expression and fastened their paces to catch up with the little _angry_ man. 

Both Minseok and Sehun have special spots in their hearts for Chanhyun, as they watched him grow up from being a tiny bundle of a crying baby - that almost made Chanyeol cry at times too - to this bundle of laughter and hyperactiveness they sometimes have trouble keeping up. Being old has its consequences, okay. 

Minseok, as he was with Chanyeol since the man was studying and was even there during the happiest years with of his life with Baekhyun, was appointed godfather much to the dismay and complaints of Luhan and Sehun. They can’t do anything about it, Minseok being Chanyeol’s favorite (‘That was before I was in the picture!’, as Luhan likes to exclaim) hyung he got certain privileges and honor only they can wish to have. Having met Luhan and Sehun only when they have transferred in Jeju, creating a constant connection with them. 

Catching up with his child, Chanyeol scoops him up and carries him in his arms while planting kisses all over his face that causes the beautiful sounds of a child’s laughter to ring out. “Dad stop it, it tickles!” Chanhyun tries to stop his dad. 

“Whyyyy~” Chanyeol whines back to Chanhyun making him laugh more. The other two was just watching this cute exchange between the father and son duo a few steps behind them. 

Upon entering the hotel, the group immediately went to the reception desk. “Hi, we have a reservation under the name Park Chanyeol.” Chanyeol says to the staff. After all the procedures needed for them to successfully check in they were handed their key card for room 614. After saying thank you to the friendly staff they all made their way to the elevator. 

“Come on guys, we need to put our things in the room so this little guy here can have his fun too.” 

“I need to have my fun too hyung!” was what Sehun grumpily answered which only caused laughter from both Chanyeol and Minseok and even Chanhyun was laughing at his hyung.

~O~

Luhan checks the name listed on the paper, Dr. Shim Changmin, before slowly approaching the doors of Seoul National Hospital. This was the name written as Mr. Byun’s doctor in his medical reports. Other than that single piece of paper saying he was confined in the ICU for 2 years, nothing else is known as to what happened to the CEO. 

Immediately entering the building, he went straight to the receptionist to ask for the office of the said doctor. Luhan has some questions he would like to ask.

~O~

“Mr. Byun, we have just arrived.” Jongdae says, after approaching a sleeping Baekhyun. Their plane just landed in Jeju and the CEO has a packed schedule for this day. The first of many as they inspect and ibserve the renovation in their newly acquired resort. It’s an already famous one just acquired recently by the company. The transfer of management is tedious and needed a lot of paper works but that’s just customary. 

After hearing this, Baekhyun slowly wakes up and stares out the window. He doesn’t have any memory of coming here before so it is safe to say he was looking forward to relaxing a bit too after taking care of business matters. Once the pilot deems it safe, Baekhyun and his secretary exited the plane and went straight to the awaiting car. 

“What’s my itinerary for today, Jongdae?” Baekhyun asks after getting settled in the backseat of the Mercedes. “Since we arrived a little bit early, you can still rest for a bit in your room in the hotel Baek.” Jongdae answers. 

“Hmmm, a rest wouldn’t be bad. Thank you.” Was Baekhyun’s reply before closing his eyes and leaning back. He misses the look of worry his friend was giving him, he’s been more withdrawn that usual. Jongdae sighs and just lets him be, maybe the upcoming reveal of his engagement has been bothering him these days.

~O~

“Mr. Changmin, good morning, I made an appointment with you last week.” Luhan greets, once the said doctor allowed him to enter his office. “Ah yes, please sit down.” The doctor answers, smiling at Luhan. He must’ve thought he was there for a consultation, well he is gonne consult, alright, but not about him. 

After getting settled and with the doctor looking expectantly at him, Luhan says, “Its about a patient of yours a year ago… Byun Baekhyun?”

Interestingly, the doctor seems to be shocked at the mention of the name. 

“What about him?”

~O~

Sehun and Chanhyun are busy playing by the pool when they saw almost all of the employees suddenly form a line by the passageway. It’s blurry given their distance but it was still interesting to see for Sehun who has only seen scenes like this happen in dramas and movies that include chaebols in the story line. He thinks maybe a bigshot of the company just arrived, but not thinking too much of it. 

Shrugging, he goes back to the book he was reading while he was assigned as Chanhyun’s chaperone for the afternoon. His hyungs chose to stay at their room claiming they’re all tired and needed the rest. He would rest too, because being a working student isn’t an easy job okay, but Chanhyun was about to throw a tantrum and it’s not like they can say no to the little puppy when he sets those eyes and pout to work. 

Looking back to the kiddie pool expecting a brown haired, two feet child waddling and splashing around, Sehun swears his heart stopped when what he expected to see wasn’t there. Immediately standing up and looking around, he left his seat and started running and checking all the kids. 

Chanhyun, on the other hand, after coming back from the bathroom and seeing his Uncle Sehun missing from his seat was confused. Remembering what his daddy told him earlier about making sure he’s always with his uncle, he decided to look for him too. He knows how his Sehun uncle looks like, anyway, tall and white. That should be easy, Chanhyun cheers within himself. 

He was busy running when he suddenly bumped into someone, he was about to fall but the person (ajushi in Chanhyun’s young mind) was able to catch him. Chanhyun found himself looking at a very familiar set of eyes, 

“Appa?” he asks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for this short update! two more weeks of school and i'll try to finish this during break <3  
> once again, thanks for reading! (unbeta-ed)


	5. Missed Chances

Baekhyun, together with Jongdae and a few of his bodyguards, make their way to the company’s newly renovated hotel and resort. This being Baekhyun’s first time here, he made sure to pass by the outdoor area first to check its amenities. He observes quite a few families lounging by the pool, some foreigners and locals having some fun in their newly improved recreation area. 

Being engrossed by his observations he fails to notice a child running towards them at a fast speed. Sure enough, a collision is bound to happen with the child running full speed and not seeing that there were people on his way. An ‘oomf’ from both parties alerts his companions about what happened. The men in black - what he secretly calls these bodyguards - immediately reaches out for the kid but Baekhyun puts his hands up to stop them. 

“I’m sorry!” The child exclaims, looking up at a confused Baekhyun with a sheepish smile that makes his eyes form into a crescent shaped one. Baekhyun loses his breathe at the sight of such familiar eyes… _Where did he see that before?_ He wonders internally. 

Baekhyun feels a little nudge from his right and _-oh!-_ “It’s okay. Are you hu-rt?” He just asks the child who is tilting his head in confusion. Jongdae, who was the one who nudged him, is looking at him questioningly. However his attention is elsewhere at the moment. Looking down, he sees the child nod his head energetically before shuddering because of the cold breeze, only wearing his swimming attire and still a little bit wet from his swim. After noticing it, Baekhyun hurriedly takes off his blazer and knelt down to cover him, receiving a cute ‘thank you’ in return. 

After closer inspection, Baekhyun’s attention zeroes in on the child’s eyes once again. He seems to have a very familiar set of droopy eyes that Baekhyun can’t pinpoint where he first saw, a cute pair of pink lips that are currently open in wonder and two overly large ears that Baekhyun can’t deny looks very endearing. He was about to ask the child who he is when,

“Appa?” the child suddenly asks while staring straight in Baekhyun’s confused orbs. Unbeknownst to them, two similar sets of eyes are staring at each other with the same confusion reflected on its orbs. 

And like any other situation like this when a CEO suddenly bumps into a child and have the child call him appa - _does that even happen?-_ Baekhyun can only ask back, “Appa? Who’s appa?”

Instead of being fazed by the not so positive reply, the child wraps his two tiny arms around Baekhyun’s shoulder in reply. The blazer he draped beforehand, falling to the ground with one of his bodyguard picking it up. 

The sudden hug freezes Baekhyun and left Jongdae and his security guards shocked and not knowing what to do. A reaction that Baekhyun credits to his usual cold demeanour towards everyone. Although he is kind, he is strict and always has this no-nonsense CEO persona turned on everytime he goes to work and is on official business. 

Although confusing, the hug isn’t unwelcome and so he hugs him back in return. He takes the child in his arms, slowly stands up, and he swears this was the warmest feeling he’s ever felt ever since he woke up alone in the hospital. A kind of warmth that he didn’t know he was capable of feeling again. 

“You’re appa!” The child answers, belatedly after pulling back from the hug. His eyed crinkling and full of joy. The child must’ve been really comfortable with strangers when he’s not even squirming with Baekhyun carrying him right now. 

“Huh? Wha-”

“And I’m Chanhyun!” The boy introduces himself still grinning at Baekhyun like he just made the boy’s day. But before Baekhyun can say anything back to this, they were interrupted by a blonde, tall guy running to their direction while shouting,

“Chanhyun! There you are!” He’s out of breathe, but relief is obvious in his eyes when he sees the child safe, although being carried by a stranger. His Chanyeol hyung is surely gonna kill him later. 

Chanhyun immediately looks at the nearing man while happily calling out, “Uncle!” Baekhyun’s bodyguards immediately moves to stop the approaching man but Baekhyun gave them a signal to let him go near them.

Baekhyun carries the baby more securely before facing the newcomer, with Chanhyun who seems to be more excited with the man’s appearance. Baekhyun chuckles at the cute sight and whispers, “Calm down little guy.” To which Chanhyun just smiles to in response before nodding his head and indeed calming down. What an obedient baby, Baekhyun muses, he must’ve been raised by great parents. 

“I’m so sorry sir!” the panting man says once he’s gathered enough composure, to Baekhyun, his bodyguards letting him go near, and asked for the child in which Baekhyun reluctantly agrees. Strangely, Baekhyun feels a little pang to his heart when the child was no longer in his arms having let him go immediately scared of making the newly arrived guy angry. Chanhyun looks back at him with a longing expression and Baekhyun can’t help but reciprocate the feeling. 

“I was just distracted for a minute and I-” blonde guy tries to explain but he doesn’t have to, it wasn’t a big deal anyway. 

“Ah no, it’s okay, Mr-?”

“Sehun.” He supplies. 

“-Sehun.” Baekhyun dismisses him, then he alternatively looks at the guy and Chanhyun, who was still busy staring at him despite the arrival of this person and asks, “Is he your brother?”

Sehun shakes his head no and with a hand scratching the back of his neck said, “We’re not really blood related, but yes he sort of is…? I’m his assigned babysitter for this afternoon.” He finishes, hand going back to securely carrying the child. He chastises the toddler gently telling him not to run away like that again. 

But Chanhyun interrupts him and started exclaiming excitedly. “Uncle! Look it’s appa!” This statement just made Sehun confused, as far as he knows, Chanhyun doesn’t have an appa. A sad and heartbreaking reality, especially to see him so excited at the prospect of having one. 

“I’m right, right?” Chanhyun adds while pointing at Baekhyun, wriggling on his uncle’s hold. Once Sehun realizes what he meant, he just bows again making sure his hold on Chanhyun is secure while saying sorry to him for being disturbed. 

Sehun is laughing awkwardly after the silence that seems to keep on happening, “Uhm, sorry about that, Mister. Chanhyun’s probably just excited to be here. I don’t know why he keeps on calling you that?”

He stares at Chanhyun at this, conveying a question he hopes a four year old child could understand. But kids need more than just a stare to be able to understand the situation so Chanhyun just stares back at him too. Innocent eyes staring back at him as if asking him what was wrong with the things he just did. 

“Ah, you are guests of the resort?” Baekhyun asks while giving them a smile, not noticing how Jongdae froze beside him. 

“Yes, we are appa!” Chanhyun decides to join their conversation, dropping the A word again. 

“Chanhyun, what are you saying?” Sehun softly asks the child, getting on eye level with Chanhyun. “He’s not your appa.” Feeling shy over the situation he’s in. He couldn’t even look at the guy, who he assumes is a very important person, scared that he might be feeling unhappy about this already. 

“But -” Chanhyun starts, “He looks like the one in the picture.” Chanhyun answers, tears already glistening in his eyes.

Even though confused as to what picture the child is talking about, Sehun just carries him in his arms and whispers something in his ears. “Chanhyun, don’t cry okay? I’m gonna bring you to your dad.” It hurts him too seeing their favorite bubbly little guy be this sad, he must’ve really thought this person was his appa, but sadly it’s just an impossible thing. 

All the while Baekhyun is just standing there trying to control and understand this sudden longing he’s feeling. Seeing the child being taken from him, being carried by another person and now crying softly makes him want to take Chanhyun away from Sehun.

_What is suddenly happening to him? Why are you so concerned?_

Baekhyun has a lot of things to do but to be called an appa, disturbed and definitely making him miss the time he should’ve spent resting, strangely doesn’t bother him even one bit. 

“Ajusshi you’re not my appa?” the child asks, eyes still hopeful while looking at Baekhyun. Baekhyun’s heart breaks a little but still, he needs to tell him the truth so, he offered a smile and a little shake of his head. “No, I’m not. I’m sorry.” The “I hope I was” being left unsaid. Even Baekhyun is surprised by that inner thought, but with how cute and warm the toddler was, he thinks it's just a normal reaction. To want to be this child’s appa and be the one to hold and sing him to sleep in the evening and shower him with kisses in the morning. 

Seeing the dejected look on the child’s face makes Baekhyun wish he was indeed the person he was looking for. That he was the appa he was so excited to see. But alas fate couldn’t have it that way. Even if this isn’t the Baekhyun now, this isn’t the cold CEO façade he’s let everyone, including his parents see and believe.

A façade made to be able to fool them into thinking he doesn’t care about his part anymore. That he is ready to play his role as his mother’s favorite robot.

But still, he doesn’t care what will happen from what he’s about to say,

“But you can call me that if you want?” Baekhyun slowly offers, heart thudding nervously inside his chest. This question made both Jongdae and Sehun shocked and stare at him wide eyed. 

Baekhyun’s sure this little piece of information will make it to his mother with her little spies everywhere. But frankly, he doesn’t care anymore. Seeing this child has given him courage and fire that he doesn’t know he’s still capable of feeling.

“Mister, you don’t have to do that” Sehun starts saying but was interrupted once again when the child in his arms squirmed and asked Sehun to lower him. Chanhyun immediately ran to Baekhyun’s direction and hugs him, the latter already in a kneeling position anticipating it.

“Really? I can call you that?” Chanhyun asks while snuggled to the crook of Baekhyun’s neck. 

Baekhyun chuckles at this, feeling Chanhyun’s breath on his neck and making him feel ticklish. “Yes, you can. I just said so right?” He gives him his infamous square shaped smile that nobody has seen for years, never really having the reason to be that happy.

But now he is. Having this child in his arms just gave him a sense of comfort that he only got from being held in his dreams by the unidentified man in his dreams. Baekhyun is finally happy even for just a short moment. 

This little exchange is being watched by two pairs of eyes, one confused yet happy Chanhyun seems to have found a new friend while the other is concerned about the implications of this but also happy to see his friend and boss smile like that again.

 

“Hello Mr. Sehun, I’m Jongdae by the way, Mr. Byun’s secretary.” Jongdae introduces while offering his hand for a shake. Sehun accepts it, “Ah, yes. Hello mister. I’m so sorry for the disturbance caused by Chanhyun, sir.” 

“That’s nothing, that’s the first time I saw him smiling like that again.”

Although confused Sehun just says proud, “Chanhyun is a ray of sunshine everywhere.” 

“I’m sorry, ajusshi. I hope you’re not angry at me.” Chanhyun says softly to a still happy Baekhyun, blushing in the cheeks and suddenly feeling shy. 

“It’s okay, in fact I wanna see you again… If I can?” Hesitation clear on his voice, looking at Sehun when he asked this. 

“Of course you can!!” Chanhyun joyfully answers, even before Sehun could process the question. Sehun just laughs at this excitement coursing through Chanhyun and nods. 

Having no choice but to give Chanhyun’s new friend their bakery’s address. “You can come visit us at our cafe if you like?” He offers to which Baekhyun eagerly nods, Jongdae immediately takes note of the address and the guy’s number. 

Afterwards Sehun calls Chanhyun since it's now time to go back to his father, the child only letting go with promises of being able to see each other again. Baekhyun wants it soon, already missing the child even when he’s still holding him. 

“Can I hug you again, Mr. Ajusshi?” Baekhyun shakes his head teasingly, “That’s not what I’m called.” 

“Oh!” Chanhyun giggles, “Can I hug you again, appa?” 

Baekhyun nods and tightens his arms around the child, Chanhyun tries his best to wrap his arms around his shoulders. The CEO doesn’t want to let him go anymore, wishing that there be some kind of miracle and he ends up being the child’s father indeed.

“Thank you appa!” Chanhyun says one last time and gave Baekhyun a kiss on the cheek before running towards Sehun and holding his hand. With one last wave of goodbye Baekhyun is left with Jongdae surrounded by his staff and the life he has known. Somehow a big chunk of his heart being carried by the child who’s clutching Sehun’s hand tightly. 

 

When they were already out of sight, Jongdae turns to Baekhyun and observes him. He’s sporting this melancholic expression on his face and so, to lighten the atmosphere, he jokes, “Are you keeping a son somewhere we don’t know about?” 

Baekhyun laughs at that. “I wish. I wish he was my son.” 

“Well if I didn’t know you two, you could pass of as father and son, with your eerie resemblance to each other.” Jongdae states nonchalantly. 

Baekhyun blinks and stares at his friend. “Are you serious?” 

“Yeah…” Baekhyun was waiting for more explanation when Jongdae’s phone beeped. “Oh. Sorry about this Baekhyun but we should get going now, you won’t have time to rest anymore.” 

The CEO sighs, so much for wanting to have a quick shut eye first before his meeting, but it’s not like he would complain over what happened. Meeting Chanhyun was like an energy boost he never thought he’d need. 

Smiling at the thought of seeing the child again during his free time, which would be better if he started on his series of appointments, “Okay, let’s go!” 

Jongdae smiles at his friend, meeting the child was quick but it suddenly gave Baekhyun a breath of life. “Well, we better get going to the hotel’s function room.”

~O~ 

Chanyeol’s trip to dreamland suddenly ended when he felt a force jump on his bed startling him awake. He’s about to jump up to confront the said force when he heard the tiny giggles of his baby boy. He groans, and turns over in bed from his previous position of lying face down. Chanyeol opens his eyes to a beautiful set of puppy eyes staring eagerly at him, in his groggy state he whispers, “ Baekhyun?” which was answered by a “Daddy no!” 

Chanyeol blinks his eyes properly, laughing and cuddling his child who’s lying beside him on the bed. “You seem so happy today, did you have fun by the pool?” He asks, and Chanhyun nods cutely making his father burst in happiness. He kisses his forehead and was ready to cuddle him back to sleep when Chanhyun speaks. 

“Daddy I saw appa today!” Chanhyun says in an excited voice. Chanyeol’s eyes opened wide at this and all he could do is utter a confused, “what?” 

“Appa!” He says matter of factly, “I saw him walking earlier, lots of tall men wearing black! He even hugged Chanhyun lots of times!!!” Chanyeol let Chanhyun blabber about his experience earlier, small sentences that his four year old mind is capable of forming. 

He takes a deep breath after talking nonstop and stares at his father after, Chanyeol as a response just laughs and hugs him closer. He turns his attention to Sehun who’s playing on his phone while lying on the bed next to his. “What is he talking about?” 

“He hugged a total stranger earlier and started calling him appa.” Sehun shrugs, going back to his phone. 

Chanyeol stutters. “W-what? Chanhyun! You can’t do that!”

“Why” Chanhyun blinks at him innocently, not seeing the wrong in what he did earlier. “But it was appa!” 

“He looked like appa…” He whispers. 

Chanyeol’s confused, “Who looks like who baby?” 

Instead of answering his father, Chanhyun breaks free from Chanyeol’s hold and begins rummaging through his father’s stuff. Chanyeol sits up and watch as his son looks through his backpack intent on looking for something. 

“Found it!” Chanhyun exclaims in joy, running back to his father to give him his wallet the confusion of said father. “Open it daddy!” 

Chanyeol obliges, immediately softening at the sight of their family picture he put inside. It’s the first photo of their family together, one day after Baekhyun gave birth to Chanhyun at the hospital; Baekhyun was sitting on his bed, head leaning on the crook of his neck while carrying a bundle of blankets with a one day old Chanhyun inside, Chanyeol sitting beside him with a hand around his shoulder. 

It was undeniably one of the greatest days in Chanyeol’s life. “What is it baby?” 

“That’s him! That’s appa!!” Chanhyun is once again excited, beaming at his father in happiness. 

Chanyeol’s confused but answers nonetheless. “Yes, baby, that’s your appa.” 

“Yes! I saw him earlier!” The toddler beams at him. The sureness in his eyes and the inability of children to tell lies, makes Chanyeol’s heart beat a lot faster. He’s nervous and he doesn’t want to hope, buy, what if? 

Sehun who was just watching them earlier, stands up and looks over what Chanhyun has been pointing out. “Oh!” Sehun exclaims, Chanyeol looks at him questioningly, heart thudding in unexplainable excitement. “That was him by the entrance. Hyung, lemme se-” 

Before he could finish, Chanyeol already makes his way out of the room, clutching his wallet and running like his life depends on it. Truthfully, it does. Cos it can’t be right?

~O~ 

What they expected to be a long meeting was cut short because of the text message Baekhyun just received from his mom. They don’t have another choice other than to cancel it and move it a later date, making Baekhyun’s stay at this branch longer than the expected one week duration. 

Even if Baekhyun wanted to continue the meeting they’ve already started, his mom would know that he didn’t go to the airport to meet up with Kim Jongin. He massages his temple at this sudden stress, it’s not like the other is a baby anyway, he’s a full grown man capable of driving his own self. But his mom and her whims, wanting to play as a matchmaker to the two of them. Jongin’s lifestyle as a part time model and a heir to his dad’s oil conglomerate isn’t really attractive to Baekhyun. So if they ever get married, it definitely won’t be because of love. 

Jongdae calls his attention once he’s done tidying up the papers that was set up earlier, he would’ve have to reschedule most of Baekhyun’s appointments to accommodate this change. 

“Let’s go?” 

Baekhyun nods and gingerly stands up, mind preoccupied of things that they could be talk about later. They should at least enjoy some conversation, if some sort of friendship forms between them then maybe their marriage life wouldn’t suck as much as he expects it to. 

“Okay.” 

Just as they were about to exit the hotel, a sudden influx of tourists have just arrived, making the once peaceful place as chaotic as it can be. Parents looking for their children, tour organizers talking to the receptionists to handle their rooms and some others handing out room arrangements to the tired and disgruntled visitors. 

Baekhyun, Jongdae and his entourage of bodyguards carefully navigates this crowd, not wanting to add to this chaos. Everyone, although busy, turns to look at them, however, entranced and curious as to who he might be. He smiles to some whom he met gazes with and gives them a little nod being the welcoming owner that he is. 

Just as they reached the car, and Jongdae has already entered from the other side, Baekhyun hears a distant call of his name. He looks back but doesn’t see anyone. Shrugging it off and thinking it was all just his tired brain playing games with him he gets inside the car so they can start to their destination. 

Especially since the voice sounds like _him,_ the man of his dreams, literally and figuratively.

~O~ 

Chanyeol runs with no clear destination in mind, only one thing is repeating over and over in his head, and it's to find him. Chanhyun and Sehun could’ve just seen another person and not really Baekhyun, _his_ Baekhyun. It couldn’t be, his mother even told him that he died and he had attended his funeral even from far away having been banned by Baekhyun’s parents. 

He taps on the elevator buttons repeatedly until he hears the ping, announcing the arrival of it. He remembers the two earlier said that they’ll go have a little swim, so that’s where he’s going. To the swimming pool area, near the entrance. 

He taps his foot impatiently as the floors go down slowly, why does it feel longer than when they took it earlier. His heart is beating fast and uncontrollably, frankly, Chanyeol is not ready to face the consequence of this action of his. 

What if it really is Baekhyun? What would he do? What would he say? How will he take it? What would happen? 

Where have you been the past four years, Baekhyun? Why didn’t you look for us? Why did your mother make me believe that there is no way, in this lifetime, will I be able to hold you in my arms again? 

Unending string of questions with this being the most important; “Do you still love me and Chanhyun?” 

Most importantly, what if it wasn’t Baekhyun? Would he be able to survive the pain of having his hopes crashed by this false alarm? How will he be able to function again, now that he’d been reminded of the pain he felt when Baekhyun was taken away from his and his arms? 

Regardless, Chanyeol runs as fast as his long legs could carry, if he was here earlier, surely he could be still in the area? It hasn’t been long since Chanhyun and Sehun returned to their room. So that’s where he would head first. 

Just as he was about to turn towards where the pools are, he sees an entourage of men in suits, passing by the end of the hallway. He follows them to the lobby, but was halted by the crowd of tourists, who have come back to life once the dreamy entourage has passed by. Chanyeol tries to pass through but is being stopped by many disgruntled tourists wanting to go to the opposite direction.

He’s near the grand entrance when the man whom he supposes was leading the group turns sideways, giving him a glimpse of his features. Chanyeol’s breathing halts, it can’t be…. 

He wants to run to him to make sure but a new group of tourists just blocked his way, while struggling with this, he shouts his name. “Baekhyun!” Hoping his loud voice would be able to make it towards him even given the distance between him and the man. 

The man looks towards his direction, and Chanyeol couldn’t believe his eyes and what he’s seeing. Byun Baekhyun, it is him. What could be the chances of him looking like his deceased husband and answering to the same name? Before he could move forward and look at him more clearly, somebody collides with him from his back and he falls forward, covered by the crowd of tourists still warming the lobby area. 

The mother of the child that pushed him to fall keeps on apologizing profusely, but Chanyeol doesn’t hear a word she says, distracted and on a mission. After making sure the child isn’t hurt by the fall, for he is a father too, he immediately looks at the direction Baekhyun was earlier. He goes out of the building, the majority of tourists having entered the hotel already, and runs towards the parking area. When he sees no sign of the Mercedes, he runs towards the road hoping against hope that maybe he’ll catch a glimpse of the car’s plate number to no avail. 

Chanyeol screams in frustration, with tears streaming down his face. He lets them fall freely, having no energy to wipe them yet, hand clutching his chest where his heart is. This excruciating pain of having Baekhyun near him but still failing to catch him. He screams in pain and in sorrow, repeating Baekhyun's name to himself over and over. 

He stops after a while, gathering his last resolve and peace of mind. Ignoring all the onlookers that are not so discreetly stealing glances at him, they don’t matter to him. Only one person does, the same person that could calm him down and make him okay. His son, Chanhyun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im updating this after a year TT im sorry :( i qyickyl edited the other past chapters before i worked on this. this has been checked by me but if i missed more mistakes pls tell me ><

**Author's Note:**

> comments will be highly appreciated :DD


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